WorldStage– A Senator from the South-West Nigeria, Rilwan Adesoji Akanbi has warned Nigerian parents of the consequences of sending adolescent children for education abroad.
Issuing the caution in a statement titled “Children Going Abroad To Study: A Candid Advice For Parents,” Akanbi said it’s not to parents’ advantage for their children to be far away from them as they (children) develop, asserting that they have a higher chance of losing relationships with them.
“It is not to your advantage when your children are too far away from you as they develop. You have a higher chance of losing relationships with them when they are too far away from you, and all your investments gone into ruins,” he stated.
Akanbi said a child will succeed either at home or abroad, notwithstanding that there could be more opportunities for them outside, which he said is not automatic.
While reminding parents that it’s survival of the fittest out there and extremely tough to be above average, he urged them to stop putting themselves under undue financial pressure in a rat race to send children abroad, especially at tender ages.
Senator Akanbi also hinted on the risk of losing out completely when parents grow old as the children are completely alienated from a home environment they aren’t familiar with.
Backing his advice with a real case situation, the Senator narrated: “I have a neighbour who sent her adolescent child for elementary school in America while she lives with her husband in Nigeria.
“A friend came into my house about 4 years ago, bringing her 16-year old daughter for my advice. She got an admission to study Engineering in a Canadian university as an undergraduate.
“The two of them sat down while I asked basic questions about her dad’s finances. He told me how he was going to sell his only land to raise the tuition.
“I asked him what he would sell the following year, he was speechless. I asked if he was going to abandon a 16-year old girl in a foreign land without being able to check on her regularly and also bring her back home when on holidays, he couldn’t respond.
“I turned to the young lady and gently advised her not to put her parents under undue pressure. I told her to take the option of going into a University in Nigeria, and she could go for a masters program abroad when she is done. She saw reasons, agreed with me and took the option of going into a Nigerian private university.
“A few days ago, the father called me with so much excitement, the daughter had been given a student visa to study for a Masters degree in the most prestigious Engineering school in the whole of Canada. Getting an admission to study Engineering in that University as an undergraduate requires a minimum of 96 average from high school.
“What has she really lost? Nothing. Rather, she has had the opportunity to develop well in her own environment before launching into a foreign land while under the tutelage of her parents.
“Some of us did it from high school, some from undergraduate levels.
“The immediate thought of most parents who could afford such expensive investments in their children is giving them the best of education in a better environment.
“Most of us tend to forget education is not all about academics, educating a child includes learning about cultures, ways of life, behavioral patterns, etiquettes.
“Sending your children abroad at tender ages while you do not live with them is not different from distance relationship between a husband and wife. You are extremely lucky if you can sustain the relationship afterwards.”
The Senator therefore candidly advised younger parents not to be in a hurry to push their children out, cautioning that education is not only about academics.
“There are a lot involved in parenting and a child becoming a total person,” he stated.
